All Kinds of News for November 08, 2017
Dragonfly Transitions, a young adult treatment program in southern Oregon, supports parents through the pivotal stage of raising a young adult in emerging adulthood. The success of a student in the treatment process is often tied to the willingness of a parent to engage and to be an active participant in the treatment journey.
To support this experience, Dragonfly Transitions facilitated a Family Workshop during the last week of October. Dragonfly offers Family Workshops three times a year to provide a supportive space for open and direct dialogue between family members, which can increase self-awareness and mutual understanding. These workshops often result in the most meaningful and uniquely impactful therapeutic progress for both the student and their family.
A mother of a current student recently sent an email in which she shared her joy at her child’s accomplishments and the acknowledgment that there was still a long journey ahead full of the unknown and anticipated setbacks and successes. She shared that she’d embarked on her own journey of developing new skills and interests, outside of her role with her child, through learning about meditation and Buddhism. She kindly sent an article that she’d found impactful from an adaptation on Raising Resilience: The Wisdom and Science of Happy Families and Thriving Children by Christoper Willard (2017).
What follows are themes pulled from the article that may be useful for a family contemplating entering the treatment process or perhaps provide a moment of reflection for those already navigating the oftentimes challenging process of change.
As humans we move through phases of life that are stressful. Change and uncertainly are about the only constants that can be depended upon, and these oftentimes contribute to suffering as well as growth. There is little that is more stressful, joyful, uncertain, or a catalyst for change than parenting. How do parents survive and thrive with the pain, suffering, and joy of life and also help children to do the same?
- Learn to identify and acknowledge emotions and teach your child to do the same.
- Engage with emotion in a stable and balanced manner. This supports a secure base of attachment with children and increases optimal physical, psychological, and spiritual development.
- Be attached, but not enmeshed. “I want you to be happy, but I don’t need you to be happy in order for me to be OK”.
- Support your child in not over identifying in one area, i.e. the smart child, the athlete, the musician. Encourage a variety of interests, so they develop a range of skills and flexibility.
- Find the silver lining when things don’t go as planned.
- Allow them to make choices and mistakes and to skin their knees.
- Show gratitude and appreciation for others.
- Take ownership of mistakes. Don’t blame others.
- The path to success is long and often has failure along the way. Share your experiences of failure with your child. How did you overcome the setback and find the opportunity and resilience to move forward?
- Humans are resilient. Your child is too. Believe in their ability and demonstrate this through allowing them the space to learn from their mistakes.
About Dragonfly TransitionsDragonfly Transitions serves young adults 18 -30 in three locations in Southern Oregon – Klamath Falls, Ashland, and the Homestead (for men, just south of Klamath). Students learn life skills and work to transition into a healthy young adult life with independence, autonomy, integrity and sustainability. Dragonfly provides opportunities for real world experience in a stable, supportive environment where students can flourish.